Life's Too Short for Video Ports
The Greatest Episode of the Simpsons
As a jack-of-all-trades IT pro, I have a lengthy list of frustrations – both of the large and small variety. However, after more than 15 years working IT in a small office environment, there’s one nuisance that has come to trump all others.
Güdboi Resort and Spa
My hot take in which I argue that Trash of the Titans is the best episode of The Simpsons, and more to the point, the most important and enduring.
Here's a concept: a spa and resort populated (or should I say, pupulated? ...sorry) by adorable canine companions. The ultimate answer to the cat-café. Anyway, here's some toiletries labels I created for fun.
'Tis the season for angry crows here in Metro Vancouver (they're guarding their nests – eggs and now fledglings). Inspired in part by this, and wanting to do an artistic project in Adobe Illustrator, I drew this artwork, "Zoey Crow". Zoey Crow is mad because you're too close to her nest and not readily giving up your food. Silly hoo-man.
It's an attempt to make something complicated with lots of simple shapes (mostly ellipses, triangles, and line segments). Looking at reference photos also made me realize that crows are, in their way, very colourful birds – I've tried to emphasize that here.
A Theremin in Garageband
Sometimes, you just gotta have yourself a good rant…
What is Meltdown/Spectre and How Does it Affect You?
My website logs show that someone was looking for my now-11-year-old tutorial on making a theremin in GarageBand. Shockingly, the instrument still works after all these years (probably because its generator is so simple).
The original tutorial is provided as-is herewith. Some adjustment may be required for modern versions of GarageBand.
The Hypocrisy of Blaming North Korea for WannaCry
Over at OpenMedia, I've written a rundown on the Meltdown/Spectre CPU vulnerability: what it is, and what you can do to protect yourself from it.
The Definitive 10 Worst Christmas Songs... Period
Writing for OpenMedia, I respond to yesterday's accusation by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security blaming North Korea for the WannaCry ransomware. And the truth is, there's plenty blame to spread around.
The Story of the Greedy Road Baron
Everyone has one, right? Their not-so-secret list of The Worst Christmas Songs, with footnotes for each. Your mileage may vary, but this is my list – in which ten songs are definitively the WORST.
I am the Vancouver Mocha Snob
Once upon a time, there was a lowland kingdom, called Broodendam...
Meghan, You Are Mega
I ruminate on why I love the mocha, before reviewing a bunch of Vancouver coffee shops' mochas. YUM.
The End of Information Security
Today is the last day at OpenMedia for Communications Manager Meghan Sali. We're gonna miss you, Mega.
The Daily Newt
I’ve accomplished a lot in the two years since I re-launched this blog. Today however, reading the news, and reflecting on those past two years, it also sometimes feels like I haven’t done a single goddamned thing.
Welcome to the end of infosec. In the words of a fictional IT pro: Hold onto your butts.
Governments Need to be Advocates for Infosec – Not Opponents
I'm pleased to announce the launch of my next-generation journalism media empire: The Daily Newt (ie: a parody news site). With a special focus on technology, science, and politics, I have high hopes that we'll be a worthy addition to your balanced breakfast of fake news.
Theresa May Proposes Outlawing Quantum Entanglement
Misguided government policy is actively undermining your safety online, and that needs to change, SOON. Governments should be working to strengthen encryption for the safety of citizens everywhere.
Devices Too Smart for Our Own Good
I wrote a parody news piece about Theresa May, outlawing encryption, and the ridiculous end-results of such thinking. Enjoy!
OpenMedia Interviews Me
Who gets more value from smart devices: is it consumers, or is it companies, criminals, and spies? In my latest piece for OpenMedia, I explore the pros and cons of all our things being internet-connected smart devices.
What Would the Web be Like Without Net Neutrality?
Fourteen months after I officially started volunteering with OpenMedia, the OMance is still going strong, which is why OpenMedia's Community Engagement Specialist Aleks Besan recently interviewed me. Thanks to OM for deciding to showcase my contributions! <3
It takes a little imagination to conceive of what's possible without net neutrality protections in the U.S., but it's well worth the effort. In my latest article for OpenMedia, I speculate on what might come next, and it's not pretty.
I make no apologies for my Minecraft puns.