I've got a minor beef with language and I'm not gonna take it anymore!

If you're like me, you stay informed by browsing around Google News. Doing so for a good couple of years has made me realize exactly how often news organizations are prone to using the verb "slam" to describe insult or severe criticism. See for yourself. "Bush Slams Democrats" "Protesters Slam Bush" "China Slams America" "Tennis Club Slams County Parks Board". Somebody find these people a thesaurus! It'll tell you that "Slam" as "criticism" is fairly informal slang. What I'd give for a little variety.

Anyway, it's important to recognize that language is fluid and evolves. As such, please be advised of the following definition reassignments:

Grand slam: A particularly big criticism, which simultaneously burns several people at once.

Slam dunk: Insulting someone just before you push them into a body of water.

Telephone slamming: Calling someone up to criticize/insult them over the phone.

Slam poetry session: A gathering where everyone in attendance talks about how whiny and equivocal poets are.