Google provides all sorts of helpful travel directions. For example, if you were to ask it how to travel from Chicago to London, it will tell you exactly where to go (check out direction number 20).

A Darth Vader gargoyle is watching from the corner of an American cathedral, and apparently has been since 1980.

Posted at 02:39 PM | Comments (5)

Blogging on a Monday evening seems appropriate. I'm just out of that weekend frame of mind where, comparatively, I don't care about the internet. It's also the evening where the noise machine (ie: Iain's band) blares above my head unrepentantly and makes doing many things in my home much less feasible. If you haven't been in my house on a Monday evening, you really don't understand. The house SHAKES. They play with earplugs, which are often required for me too. It's not as if I don't want people to express themselves, it's just that occasionally I'd like them to express themselves somewhere else.

Fortunately, it's been nice out lately, so taking a walk doesn't mean enduring the cold and dark. Quite the contrary: the cherry blossoms are blooming and the entire neighborhood smells loverly.

I finally watched the Borat movie this weekend and I have to say it was the most hilarious thing I've seen in a long time. How a man can stay in character for so long and not crack up or be utterly embarrassed with himself is beyond me. The fake anthem of Kazakhstan from the end of the film is now stuck in my head.

Next time someone tells you how easy it is to make friends, do me a favor: backhand them, spit in their face, and yell "LIAR!!" at them. It's easy to make acquaintances and such, but real friends are hard to make. It almost seems that they can only happen serendipitously. There are a few people around me right now who I'd like to be closer to. But the problem with the real interesting, smart, diverse people is they've already got so much on the go that it's difficult to get them to chat or do stuff that builds a friendship. Then again, it could be that some people just find me to be obnoxiously annoying and make excuses. Their loss. But I can probably count on my hand the number of times people have really come to me in an effort to make friends. What gives?

Hey there's someone trying to make friends now. TD Canada Trust just phoned me from their glorious calling centre. This even though I cancelled my account TWO MONTHS AGO specifically citing that I didn't want to receive any more marketing phonecalls. TD: What the fuck is your problem? Seriously, you're the corporate equivalent of the creepy stalker ex-girlfriend which I fortunately have never had. It's OVER. Stop calling me.

Contrast with my real life girlfriend who is NOT creepy and in fact awesome. Things have been rather stressful lately though. Angela has a lot (a metric shitload) of schoolwork to get through including term papers and final exams. This in conjunction with a bunch of other smaller, stress-inducing issues have left things a little ragged. She could use more support but seems to be having a little trouble finding it. I've had to be the ultra-positive, supportive boyfriend and put some of my own problems on the side-burner. At the end of the day, though, I wouldn't have it any other way, because Angela is my girl and I love her with all my heart.

And that's how I end on a positive note. :-)

Posted at 07:33 PM | Comments (4)

Angela and I have babies.

Babies that we're going to EAT.

It was almost three weeks ago that me and Ang planted seeds for peppers, carrots, and beans in pots and egg cartons. I placed the containers on a window shelf to get some sun and watered them daily with a sprayer. After two weeks I was beginning to lose hope. But then... LIFE! Little sprouts shoved clods of dirt aside with surprising strength. Their appearance makes Angela and I giddy like schoolchildren.

We made life. To eat. They'll have a decent run, though.

Posted at 08:24 PM | Comments (5)

Lots happening, not a lot of time to think. Been working on my "collaboration" project for lyrics class. I managed to swing having Jeff be my collaboration partner, so it'll be another "The Face Beneath" song for my class this afternoon. Very cool, very funny; ask me to show it to you sometime.

There will be more to say later.

Posted at 10:20 AM | Comments (0)

"I can't come to work today."

"What's wrong?"

"I gots the nipplefoot."

"Nipplefoot?"

"Nipplefoot."

"What, like foot nipples?"

"That's what I said."

"Stay home."

"Thanks."

Posted at 10:35 AM | Comments (0)

Today sucks.

I should be writing music. But I just can't. I'm blocked and there's nothing to be done about it.

I should be out getting exercise, or perhaps planting more in the vegetable garden. But it's raining. It's been raining since Friday, and it hasn't stopped once.

So time just ticks by. How fun it is.

Posted at 03:42 PM | Comments (2)

Gummy Bear Chandelier

Posted at 12:59 PM | Comments (1)

Seven years ago, our entire society was thrown into a blind panic because everyone feared that systems and programs written with just two-digits for the year would cause massive worldwide computer crashes at midnight on January 1st, 2000.

It never happened.

Upgrades were indeed important and necessary, but by the time December of 1999 rolled around, most problems were long since solved and we were mired in a culture of unnecessary fear. People with tech skills were beating ourselves over the head every time were subjected to the buzzword "Y2K". Entire business sprang up devoted to making sure organizations' systems were "Y2K Compliant". Fear and buzz made us prepared, so nothing happened.

Say, did you know that daylight savings time starts in March this year?

That's right, thanks to the wisdom of U.S. president George W. Bush, daylight savings time starts this coming Sunday. The idea is to help keep the majority of people's waking hours (evening, in particular) in sunlight, which requires less artificial light, which saves energy. Not bad for a Republican, it's almost environmentalist.

Unfortunately, your computer may not know that DST has changed. Personal computers and many computerized systems adjust their clocks automatically, taking into consideration the time zone they're in and the DST rules for that particular zone. But the rules have changed, and we need to tell that to computer systems. This time, people are rightly concerned about this much lower profile digital-time change. I've had to scrutinize our workstations, servers, and managed internet devices at work to make sure they'll be ready for the changeover.

If you have Automatic Updates turned on on your computer, chances are you're already fine and dandy. If not, you'll want to have a look at the following:

Microsoft: Update for Windows XP (KB931836) - DST update for Windows XP

DST Update for Mac OS X 10.4 (Tiger)

DST Update for Mac OS X 10.3 (Panther)

Linux Users: Hack your system. If lacking in command-prompt skills, panic.

For most of us, this is not a major issue. But it will be interesting to see exactly how many bugs will arise in our highly-digital lifestyle from this under-observed bug.

Posted at 10:24 AM | Comments (3)

I'm having a very vivid memory and I need to express myself. Those who don't want to know, don't have to read.

There were a lot of us at the Muse concert; a vast assortment of people I know who may or may not have been interconnected.

It was nice to be hanging with Nadia. It hadn't been very long since she had been away in Europe and mostly inaccessible. I'd just broken up with Nancy (for the last time) so being out and about was good.

Whatsherface was there. Terribly excited because she'd just had her nipples pierced. While she talked, I looked over at Nadia. The expression on her face is burned into my memory; an almost scientific level of detached contemplation. "Yeah? Let's see," provoked Nadia when there was space to talk. I probably rolled my eyes, fully aware of what was coming. Naturally, Whatsherface yanked up her shirt to show off her knockers with their freshly pierced nipples, right there, at our table, in the middle of the Commodore Ballroom.

After fulfilling the compulsory male requirement of at least quickly scanning the unremarkable full-frontal nudity a couple feet away from my face, I looked back at Nadia to survey the much more interesting data of her precise reaction. The expression on her face didn't change, but she did manage a slow nod of acknowledgment. Naturally, Nadia was utterly unimpressed. But I could see into her in that moment; I know exactly what she was thinking and may she strike me down if it's otherwise:

Why would you do that? Something's wrong, something bad happened to you. This is how you get attention because you don't have any value of yourself, and I feel sorry for you.

Whatsherface left the table soon after, and I leaned over to Nadia's ear:

"I didn't know you were so interested in seeing women's nipples."

She laughed, "Of course I'm not. I just wanted to see if she'd do it."

Nadia you glorious woman, you.

After the concert, some of us parted ways. The bulk of us stayed together until Broadway SkyTrain. Before we said our final goodnights, Whatsherface grabbed D and kissed her fully (as was acceptable at the time, for some reason). D was then shoved over to another one of her friends, who did the same. Then perhaps one more time, I don't remember that clearly. I would have been a bit concerned if D hadn't been wearing a bewildered smile. She was shoved up to me next, which was actually a bit surprising. It was an extraordinarily odd moment: here was my very attractive female friend in front of me, and if I grabbed her and snogged her face it would be okay because that was what I was fully expected to do. I must admit I was tempted.

I gave her a hug and kissed her on the cheek. A chorus of "Aww"s sounded. D turned around somewhat defiantly: "See... Jesse is a gentleman." I think in the long run the end result was more fulfilling.

It's 2½ years later that I feel can fully express what I wanted to in those times. I am note a prude. I am not judgmental of people's sexualities. Far from it, I am a template Scorpio; an intensely sexual person. It's an aspect of love that's very important to me. But it's a part of myself that I want to be in control of, not vice-versa. Most importantly, that part of me belongs to myself, and the lucky person I share it with, and no one else.

Posted at 10:06 PM | Comments (0)

Iain was kind enough to invite me along to a preview showing of 300. A movie based on Frank Miller's graphic novel of the same name, it's a spectacular (albeit bombastic) retelling of the King Leonidas' last stand at the Battle of Thermopylae. Iain has rightly described it as "the manliest movie ever made".

300 remains entertaining, however. And while many will argue that the movie is far too "self-serious", I add that it retains at moments a subtle humor which allows it a little wiggle room in that regard.

So, if you're looking for an ultraviolent romp through one of the darker moments in antiquity that looks really, REALLY cool (Allen, looking in your direction), go see 300 and your eyes will pop out of your skull and explode in a fine red spray, much to Frank Miller's delight. If you get caught up on little things like the unpleasantness of gore, strong female characters who are nonetheless portrayed as sex objects, and lack of realism when it comes to Newtonian physics, then 300 is not for you, nor is any other Frank Miller Story, for that matter.

So in the words of Admiral Adama, "Make your choice, son."

Posted at 09:59 PM | Comments (2)

I could rail on right now about various macabre subjects dancing through my mind, or make fun of the Boston police yet again. But I think that there's a more pressing social question that should be considered: How do you wipe your ass?

One blogger decided that since no one talks about this sort of thing, it was clearly necessary to conduct a comprehensive study. The results are truly shocking. Given the final numbers, it's clear that many of us need to brush up on proper technique.

This is social science at it's zenith, people.

Posted at 11:32 AM | Comments (0)

Definitive proof that Turner broadcasting is just an innovative marketer made into a scapegoat while Boston police are fucking twitchy idiots.

They blew up a suspicious package chained to a lamp post yesterday.

Turned out it was a traffic counter.

Strike two, BPD.

UPDATE: Strike three already! Someone puts espom salts in a high-school water cooler. Boston police and Homeland Security need to get involved. God bless those men and women who put their lives on the line to save us from traffic counters and epsom salts.

Posted at 09:35 AM | Comments (1)